In Marketing class we used to talk about the sweet spot for a consumer, the price point that they were just about willing to go to but not much farther before they would seriously re-evaluate their purchase (or, say, have to bring the subject up with your spouse…) . When I was a poor lad in college, that sweet spot was $20, which was a lot of money back then, and a serious night out. Once I got a “real job”, it became $100. Now as a grown-up, 40-something guy, it seems the price point everyone is trying to meet for professional middle class folks is $300. As evidence, I give you:

• $300 for a Weber Charcoal grill with a nice side table for all your grilling implements
• $300 for a professional grade Kitchen Aid mixer to replace my smaller model
• $300 for an iPod Touch or iPod classic to replace mine that just broke down

Still, I can’t bring myself to pull the trigger. I’ve got the gas grill. The current mixer does the job. I’ve been burning MP3s onto CDs and listening to those on the built-in CD/MP3 in the Escape.

Have I (dare I say it) become…mature?

Gross!

So my daughter, who’s almost 10, and her friend, who is10, seem to have it in their minds that on the last day of Spring Break while Dad is home hanging out with them, that Dad will take them to movies to see, of all things, PROM NIGHT, the remake of the 1980’s Jamie Lee Curtis slasher vehicle. How they arrived at this supposition is truly beyond me, but I am being brow-beaten every 30 minutes by the Clarence Darrow of the pre-teen set (“DAD! It’s only PG-13!” “DAD! It’s no big deal–it’s just this girl who’s family was murdered by her old high school teacher, and then he escapes from prison and goes after her at her prom!” “But DAD! I know it’s all pretend!” “But DAD! It’s the girl from HAIRSPRAY, and that was PG-13!”), and all I can think is:

• Is this what I was like with my parents and seeing DRACULA HAS RISEN FROM THE GRAVE at the Windsor Plaza (and of course, the answer is yes), and…
• If your parents were murdered by your high school teacher, wouldn’t you like, move, rather than put on a brave face and go to your prom (or, at the very least, check in with the prison system to make sure everything’s OK with the mass murderer who has pledged to kill you at any cost?)

Kids!

I was at the Deli counter at grocery store yesterday with my kids, and the kids are jumping up and there’s people rolling their carts into us and I tell the counter guy “Turkey, please.” and he goes “Maple Smoked?  Mesquite smoked?  Flavored?  Brined?  Original smokehouse flavor?” and I say “Just whatever you have on hand.  And some Swiss cheese.”  and he says “Baby Swiss?  Aged Swiss?  Norweigan Swiss?”  And I started to wonder exactly when buying simple consumer products became like taking your SATs.

What’s even worse is when I’m at the lunch counter and someone is ordering a sandwich and they go “A little mayo–no, that’s too much!  And grainy mustard–no, a bit more, and lettuce, and no, just a bit of the onion…” to the point where I want to say “Why not just put on a  paper hat, get behind the counter and make it yourself?”  Honestly, it is a sandwich, a bit of sustinence until you get home…how important can this be?

I’m starting to feel like my idol Karl Pilkington, who insists “two kinds of toffee are enough.”  We have all this perceived choice, but to what end?  And a cynical person would say that this is to distract us from the real choice we genuinely need, in government, in life, in the future.

Now where’s my 7-grain sub roll?

Well in a few days it will be one month since my friend and workmate Donna passed away.  When it happened we were all very shocked, and it seemed to have a big effect on all of us.  A lot of things were said — some people were going to quit smoking (Donna smoked), some people thought they might stop stalling and get married,  I decided to write a will and work on a funny eulogy for my own funeral.  That kind of thing.

Well now, one month later, I guess it won’t come as much of a surprise that most things for those of us still here have not changed.  The people who smoked are still smoking.  My friend did not propose.  I don’t have a will yet, though I have been working on my funny eulogy (Sample:  “Well, if you’re all here, and I’m not, that’s good for you guys, but not so great for me…”  Ba-dum-dah!)

Change is a difficult thing.  It’s human nature to remain in stasis.  I am not really sure if this is a good thing (Life goes on! ) or a bad thing (Are the lessons of life so easily forgotten and avoided?).  It is, as they say, what it is.  I can hardly wait to see what little effect my own demise may have!